


A Few Good Things Remain

by dsa_archivist



Category: due South
Genre: Drama, M/M, Romance, Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1999-05-06
Updated: 1999-05-06
Packaged: 2018-11-11 02:06:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11139024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dsa_archivist/pseuds/dsa_archivist
Summary: Ray's dead father makes him have doubts about his relationship with Ben. Can Ray really committ to another man?  This story is a sequel toShadows.





	A Few Good Things Remain

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Speranza, the archivist: this story was once archived at [Due South Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Due_South_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Due South Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/duesoutharchive).

A Few Good Things Remain

 

[A short round figure steps hesitantly from the shadows, her blonde  
top-knot shorter than last time... and more tousled. She holds out a  
worn sheaf of paper with a triumphant smile...] It only took... [she  
checks a date at the top of the paper] almost a year, (blush) but here  
it is. The promised next part in my music inspired series that began  
with "Blame It On The Mistletoe" and "Shadows".   
You don't have to read them first... but it would help (they can be found  
on the Archive). And, as promised in "Shadows"... this one  
is HOT! **NC-17** folks... for m/m relations in loving detail. If  
you got a problem with it... there's a little button called "Delete"  
that you should use now. TYK.  
  
The Ray here is the original one. I like the new guy, don't get  
me wrong, but there is just something about a certain Italian in grey  
Armani. ;-) Other warnings... ANGST and unrepentant Romanticism (or  
shamltz depending on your view ) What can I say, I'm a sucker for  
a happy ending. The characters don't belong to me... I'm just borrowing  
them for an extended period of time (hey, they aren't complaining ).  
I'm not making any money from this... it's all for fun. The characters  
and the songs (more country western AGHHH! Why COUNTRY?!? This time  
by Kathy Mattea) are used without permission and no harm was intended  
in their use here. Note: offset text with * in front of it are song  
lyrics. Text enclosed in // indicate character thoughts.  
  
As always, comments are ALWAYS welcome, send them with "Kender"  
in the subject line so they get to me. Thank you kindly for all the  
kind words and encouragement. Now, enough of me... on to the REAL reason  
you're reading through all this.... [the figure steps back into the lurking  
shadows. The shadows shift to reveal a dark Chicago night outside a  
rundown apartment building. On the fire escape on the third floor sits  
a lone figure staring out into the night. A figure who, before the night  
is over will discover that no matter how bleak the path looks...]  
  


## A Few Good Things Remain

  
by Kender  
  
The night was warm but Detective Ray Vecchio sat on the fire escape  
sipping his mug of hot tea just the same. If anyone had told him six  
months ago that he would actually enjoy the bitter tea that Fraser insisted  
on drinking, he'd have told them they were crazy. But then again, six  
months ago he'd never thought of Fraser as anything more than his best  
friend. He looked back through the open window at his sleeping lover  
and couldn't stop the smile that tugged at his lips. How could so much  
change in such a short time? Had it only been six months since he and  
Fraser had gone from friends to lovers? It seemed like they had been  
together forever and Ray had never been happier. //Then why are you sitting  
out on the fire escape in the middle of the night swigging lukewarm tea  
*alone* if you're so happy?// the voice in his head chided.  
  
A self-depreciating smile chased across Ray's features, 'Why' indeed.  
Maybe it was just the unatural quiet of Fraser's apartment. It's not  
that there wasn't noise. Even now the sounds of the city engulfed him.  
Cars, arguments, the familiar wail of sirens in the distance. There  
was noise. But Ray was use to the "noise" of his family.   
His brother-in-law Tony's deep snore, the sounds of his nieces and nephews  
as they begged for one more story or a glass of water before going to  
bed, Frannie listening to the radio as she fell asleep. Those were the  
sounds of home. The apartment always sounded so still to Ray's ears.  
Not that he would change a thing. He'd sleep in a sound proof room for  
the rest of his life if Fraser was by his side. But sometimes the silence  
got to be too much, and lately... Well lately, the fire escape had seen  
a lot of him, usually well into the night. He wondered why he was finding  
it so difficult to sleep, but no answers came. So, once again he sat,  
watching the night slowly pass through the run down neighborhood.  
  
Strains of guitar floated up from the apartment below. It seemed  
he wasn't the only one who couldn't sleep. It was oddly soothing to  
know he wasn't alone in his insomnia, and he wondered what would keep  
their downstairs neighbor awake so late. The music was soft but he could  
make out bits of lyrics if he listened closely. Female voices drifted  
up, one was a singer Ray had heard before but couldn't name, the other,  
he assumed, was their neighbor. She had a nice voice, at least what  
he could hear of it. She wasn't loud, but for some reason, the night  
breezes carried her voice up to the landing and Ray found himself sharing  
in her nocturnal duet. The music had a bittersweet but hopeful quality  
about it. //Has to be Country,// Ray thought, //I wonder if Benny would  
know the artist's name. Probably. He seems to know everything else.//  
  
*Eighteen wheels and a dozen roses....  
  
He remembered the first time he and Fraser had bought roses together.  
The day after New Years they had gone to every flowershop they could  
think of looking for what Fraser called "just the right roses."  
They found them in a small shop that Francesca recomended, one rose a  
distinctive shade of "Mountie red", the other a delicate white  
rose tipped with the faintest touch of crimson. He still wished he could  
have seen Elaine's face when she had come in the following morning and  
found the two roses lying on her keyboard accompanied by a plain white  
card that said simply, 'Thank you kindly'. She had tracked him down  
at the end of his shift and hugged him until he couldn't breathe. His  
protestations of innocence fell on deaf ears as she told him how happy  
she was, for both of them.  
  
Ray looked back at his sleeping partner and smiled. "She said  
she knew they were from us even before she saw the note Benny. Did I  
ever tell you that?" he whispered. "She said the flowers  
gave it away. AND she told me why you picked *that* particular rose  
you Canadian sneak. A 'Fire and Ice' rose... she said it suited me."  
He laughed softly, "You *said* she'd understand." She had  
also told him later, that seeing Fraser's words in *his* "nearly  
illegible scrawl that *some* tried to call handwriting" had been  
the most heartwarming thing she had received in years. He hadn't told  
Benny *that* either, but he had a feeling the observant Canadian knew.  
  
The three had become good friends after that Christmas holiday.  
Ray made a mental note to invite the vivacious woman to diner again soon.  
She done so much for them, and Ray *knew* he could never repay her.   
Elaine had brought them together. She'd helped him see what he'd been  
missing for so long. She had become one of their closest friends and  
supporters, being there for them as best she could. He knew it hadn't  
been easy, but she'd never turned them away. She'd kicked them both  
in the butt a few times, but she'd never turned her back on them. Ray  
wondered how he'd managed to get so lucky. //And when is it going to  
blow up in your face?// a quiet voice in the back of his mind teased.  
//You know it's too good to last.// Ray took another sip of the strong  
brew in his hands and forced the voice back into the shadows of his mind.  
  
The last six months hadn't been easy. He and Fraser were still  
adjusting to each other's habits, each other's schedules, each other's  
quirks. Even though they hadn't "officially" moved in together,  
Ray spent most of his nights at the apartment now and a good portion  
of his things decorated the once spartan apartment. It had been a big  
step for Ray. "Did you ever realized how scared I was Benny?   
I thought I'd have to choose between you and Ma, between you and my blood  
family. I've never been so scared. You were so sure it would be alright.  
You *told* me we'd get through it. I couldn't have faced Ma on my own,  
and I think you knew it. You sat there, so quiet, so strong. You're  
the only thing that kept me sane Benny. Trying to tell Ma... having  
to look into that beautiful face and know I was disappointing her. I  
was use to that with Pop, but not Ma. I would have broken right there  
without you beside me." He remembered his horror at the look in  
his mother's eyes. The heat of unshed tears that had blurred his vision  
as he tried to rise and run for the door. Anything to escape the hurt  
in those eyes. Then Fraser took hold of his hand. Without uttering  
one word, his Canadian had made it very plain that he wouldn't allow  
anyone to hurt Ray. Ray had never seen those blue eyes so intense.   
And he had never felt so safe... or so loved.  
  
It hadn't been easy, but the tension gradually faded, much to Ray's  
relief. It probably hadn't hurt that the *man* he had fallen in love  
with was Fraser, a man Rosa Vecchio already considered family. After  
that first night Ray wasn't sure he'd ever be able to go 'home' again.  
Francesca and Maria had come to see them later that week, but they heard  
nothing from Rosa. Ray had thought himself disowned until Frannie brought  
over the first basket of homecooked food "from Ma". Only then  
did Ray truly *know*.  
  
That day Fraser had seen Francesca to her car and returned to find  
his lover staring at the basket of food, crying. Thinking that Francesca's  
visit had reminded Ray of the tension back "home", he'd drawn  
Ray's slender form tightly to him, waiting for the anguish he was sure  
would follow. But it never came. Ray had curled into Fraser's arms  
with a sigh and smiled through the dampness coursing down his cheeks.  
"She's accepted it Benny. She's accepted *us*." Never had  
that beautiful smile been so bright. Now Ma sent 'care packages' home  
with them every chance she got until Fraser's small freezer was full  
to overflowing. They had been accepted as part of the Vecchio family.  
Frannie still complained from time to time about the "waste of it  
all" but Ray was *fairly* sure she didn't mean it.  
  
*A few more songs from the all night radio  
*And he'll spend the rest of his life with the one that he loves.  
  
The thought of spending the rest of his life with the handsome Canadian  
both thrilled and frightened him. He knew he wasn't the easiest man  
in the world to live with, but then, neither was Fraser.  
  
"Why Ramondo? Why are you doing this?"  
  
"Go away Pop."  
  
"No! Why are living with this Canadian fruitloop? He's almost  
gotten you killed more times than I care to count. He's a walking target,  
Boy. Get out while you can."  
  
"Maybe I don't *WANT* out Pop! Maybe I'm *finally* happy!  
Is it wrong for me to be *HAPPY* Pop?"  
  
The ghost of Carmine Vecchio regarded his son with a look of absolute  
disgust in his grey eyes, "He'll never make you happy Boy. Face  
it. You'll spend the rest of your life waiting for him to leave."  
  
"Benny's not you Pop." The harsh laugh brought back  
unpleasant memories but Ray refused to flinch, his grip tightening on  
the mug. He refused to meet his father's gaze, refused to give his father  
the reaction he was trying for.  
  
"No. But how long do you think he'll be put off?" Ray's  
head snapped up and Carmine smiled, "How long will he want to stay  
with someone who won't give him what he wants? You and I both know you'll  
*never* be able to give him that last 'step' Ramondo. Why not just accept  
it? You were never meant for this kind of life. Let it go and find  
some nice *girl* to settle down and raise a family with. Surely there's  
*Somebody* who'd have you."  
  
This time Ray did flinch at the tone in his father's voice, "Yeah.  
There's somebody who'll have me Pop... and he's laying in there in that  
bed. He accepts me. He brings out the best in me. He's my best friend,  
my partner, and the best thing that ever happened to me. I *will NOT*  
'let it go' Pop. I don't give a tinker's DAMN what you think of me or  
my life! You didn't give a damn about me when you were alive so I'll  
be *Damned* if I'll worry what you think now. Go away Pop. Go away  
and let me live my life in peace."  
  
"Don't say you weren't warned Boy. Sooner or later he'll get  
tired of your excuses or your temper or one of a half dozen other things  
and he'll leave. Just accept it Ramondo. Accept it and get out before  
he can hurt you."  
  
"Go away Pop, just go away." Ray couldn't stop the shiver  
that coursed through him as his father's ghost disappeared. Old fears,  
pushed away too long, crowded forward and Ray vainly tried to swallow  
past the sudden tightness in his throat.  
  
'he'll get tired... and he'll leave... he'll leave... he'll leave...'  
  
Ray bowed his head and finally let the tears fall.  
  
*****************  
  
*I heard a siren late last night  
*you must have felt me shiver  
*shaken by a wave of fright  
*that you calm with a whisper...  
  
"Ray?"  
  
Ray wiped angrily at his eyes, "Out here Benny." He cleared  
his throat and tried to regain his composure as his friend and lover  
stepped out on to the fire escape. Unable to face Fraser, he kept his  
eyes firmly focused on the mug of now cold tea he held tightly in his  
clenched hands. He felt a familiar warmth settle in behind him on the  
metal stairs as long bare legs were draped carelessly on either side  
of him. He could feel Fraser's warmth against his back as strong hands  
began to slowly rub his stooped shoulders.  
  
"Ray, is everything alright?"  
  
"Yeah. Everything's fine."  
  
Fraser didn't miss the nearly silent, depreciating laugh, nor could  
he ignore the tension in the shoulders under his hands. Something was  
most definitely not *fine*. He leaned in closer and pulled Ray into  
a gentle embrace. He kissed Ray's ear and nuzzled the short shorn hair,  
delighting in the texture of it against his cheek.  
  
*When living leaves my pride bruised up  
*I'm fragile as a feather  
*When storms of life just won't let up  
*you're like a change of weather  
*when dust settles on my dreams  
*you wash them clean  
*like a warm spring rain  
  
The words hit Ray at his most vulnerable. The soft guitar combined  
with the tenderness of Fraser's touch was too much, and Ray felt the  
tears burn their way down his cheeks yet again. He struggled to stop  
the tremors before they started, but it was too late, Fraser had felt  
the change. Large, masculine hands pulled him back against the warmth  
of a solid chest and Fraser's strong arms encircled him protectively.  
  
"Ray, sweetheart, please talk to me."  
  
Fraser's only answer was a half muffled sob. Without a further  
word, Fraser steered his lover off the fire escape and back into the  
apartment. He pried the coffee mug from Ray's nerveless fingers, set  
it on the kitchen counter, then drew the other man with him into the  
bedroom. He sat on the bed and pulled an unresisting Ray into his arms.  
He wasn't sure how much time passed before Ray finally spoke, but to  
Fraser it felt like years. He wasn't use to this kind of silence from  
his usually boisterous Italian.  
  
"I'm sorry Benny."  
  
He kissed a damp cheek and smiled into the bloodshot hazel-green  
eyes, "For what Ray?"  
  
"Everything."  
  
Fraser stared at Ray in confusion, which only grew with his lover's  
next words.  
  
"Benny, why do you stay?"  
  
"I don't understand Ray."  
  
"Why do you stay... here?"  
  
"Because my 'family' is here Ray. You... your family... some  
of the people at the precinct..."  
  
Ray moved from the bed and stood gazing sightlessly out the window,  
"No. I mean, why do you stay... with me? You could have anyone  
Benny, *anyone* you wanted." Feelings too long suppressed burst  
forth is a rush, "You deserve someone who can make you happy. Someone  
who can give you everything you want, need,... desire."  
  
Finally Fraser understood. He padded silently to the window and  
laid a hand on the slender, stooped shoulder, "I *have* someone  
who makes me happy Ray. I have *You*."  
  
Ray wouldn't be distracted. He turned to face Fraser and the Canadian  
cringed at the anguish in his lover's beautiful eyes. "No Benny.  
You need someone who can give you everything you deserve, not some cynical  
Chicago cop with oversized ears and a nose that's too big for his face,  
who still has trouble seeing the good in people..."  
  
"Especially himself," Fraser countered quietly.  
  
"Damn it Benny WHY!"  
  
Fraser reached out and cupped the tear stained face with his palm,  
his thumb absently wiping at the damp cheek. He searched the pained  
face, trying to decide how best to begin. Finally he leaned forward  
and lightly kissed the tightly compressed lips, "Why do I stay Ray?"  
he began softly. "I stay because I came to Chicago alone and lost  
and found a missing part of my soul. I found a best friend who worried  
enough about my being alone that he brought me to *his* home and made  
sure I felt welcome. I found a friend who stood by me and backed me  
even when he didn't understand what I was doing or why, a man who tried  
to protect me from the harsh realities of life and made sure I wasn't  
taken advantage of. I found a man who loved me enough that when I did  
the unthinkable and nearly cost him everything, he still stayed with  
me day and night in the hospital as I brooded and tried to recover, never  
once saying 'I told you so.' I stay because I found my heart. I found  
a cynical Chicago cop who tries to pretend he doesn't care about others,  
but who will do everything he can to help someone in need. I found you  
Ray."  
  
Ray's hazel-green eyes searched his lover's face, "I don't  
understand."  
  
Fraser smiled and kissed the trembling Italian, "I stay because  
you're my best friend, my partner and my lover. I stay because *you*  
make me happy and I don't want anyone else. I love that 'cynical Chicago  
cop' Ray. I love you." Fraser drew Ray's unresisting form into  
his arms and kissed the bridge of Ray's nose, "And I happen to like  
your nose Ray. It's very patrician. It makes you look very noble."  
He kissed the tip of the part in question, gaining a timid smile from  
the Italian. They stood in silence, holding each other, drawing comfort  
from the bond of love that radiated between them. Ray leaned his head  
wearily against Fraser's broad shoulder and delighted in the feel of  
Fraser's strong hands caressing his back soothingly. The neighbor's  
music floated through the open window...  
  
*like a warm spring rain  
*on the roof above  
*the way you call my name  
*when we make love  
*while the world outside my window goes insane  
*you're here to remind me a few good things remain  
  
Ray pressed his face into Fraser's shoulder, trying to stifle a  
yawn as his body finally relaxed. He felt Fraser's arms tighten around  
him.  
  
"Come to bed Ray."  
  
Fraser's voice was soft, gentle and Ray nodded, allowing Fraser to  
lead him back to the bed. Fraser untied the sash on Ray's silk robe,  
revealing the olive skin underneath. He ran his palms up the lightly  
muscled chest his fingers catching the robe and easing the fabric from  
his lover's body. Ray shivered as the slick fabric slid off his shoulders  
and down his long arms, exposing him to Fraser's gaze. Fraser smiled  
reassuringly at the Italian, kissing the sensuous lips as he took the  
robe. He eased his tired lover down onto the bed before turning to hang  
the delicate garment back in its place on the closet door.  
  
Fraser wondered at the tension in his friend. He knew Ray had been  
restless the last few weeks, but he hadn't realized the anguish his passionate  
Italian was going through. Even after six months he still had trouble  
reading Ray's moods. He was so use to Ray's volatile nature and his  
openness about how he felt, that he forgot how deeply Ray could hide  
his pain. It hurt to see Ray so upset, so unsure of himself. Francesca  
and Maria had told him about Ray's childhood, how Ray had always felt  
he had to prove himself to their father... and sometimes still did.   
Fraser finally understood how deep the hurt went in that guarded heart.  
He ran his hands over the silk, still warm from his lover's skin, and  
tried to find the words to reassure the fragile man who waited silently  
in their bed, the man who held his heart, that there was nothing he had  
to prove.  
  
Ray watched Fraser nervously, his father's words ringing through  
the silence like a death knell... //"Sooner or later he'll get tired  
of your excuses or your temper or one of a half dozen other things and  
he'll leave."// Fraser was so quiet, standing there thinking.   
He could always tell when Fraser was deep in thought, the set of the  
broad shoulders, the deep even breaths and the hundred other little things  
that all gave it away. After three years he'd learned to read the Canadian,  
and the six months they'd been together had only made it easier. //"How  
long do you think he'll be put off?"// He could feel the cold seeping  
into him again and wrapped his thin arms around himself tightly, trying  
to force the taunts out of his mind. Even dead his father could reduce  
him to an uncertain jumble of conflicting emotions without ever laying  
a hand on him. The realization only added to his self disgust. What  
must Fraser think of him?  
  
His subconscious mind was only too eager to provide an answer.   
Tears of dread and anguish squeezed passed his eyelids, but he managed  
to quell the sob that tried to escape his tightening throat. He wouldn't  
do that to Fraser, he didn't want Fraser's pity. He turned away from  
the closet and the vision before it, trying to steel himself for what  
was to come... what *always* came from such a prolonged silence. What  
had Ange called it once... the 'calm before the storm'? He didn't know  
if his heart could stand this particular storm. //*"How long will  
he want to stay with someone who won't give him what he wants? You and  
I both know you'll *never* be able to give him that last 'step'.*//   
Something within him snapped at his father's taunt and he suddenly knew  
what he had to do. "You're wrong Pop," he whispered, his heart  
warming as his course of action became clear, "I *can* give him  
that. I can give him anything."  
  
Ray eased himself from the bed, his back still turned away from  
Fraser. With trembling hands he pushed his briefs to the floor and stepped  
out of them. Taking a deep breath he turned to face his lover. Fraser  
was still facing the closet, his hand absently stroking the robe he had  
removed from Ray only a short time before. Ray hesitantly moved across  
the warm room his feet silent on the cool wood floor. He stood behind  
his lover, his body shaking, uncertain what to do next. "Benny?"  
His voice was timid even to his own ears and Fraser didn't respond.   
Ray swallowed his pride and tried again, "Benny?"  
  
Fraser startled, the beloved voice pulling him from his revery.  
He turned toward the voice smiling, "Yes Ray?" He was startled  
to find his lover standing behind him, naked and trembling. His blue  
eyes narrowed in concern, "Ray?"  
  
Ray flinched at the suspicion in those blue eyes. He pulled in  
a steadying breath but couldn't bring himself to look at those eyes again.  
He focused his eyes on the broad chest and began to speak, "Fraser?"  
  
"Yes Ray?"  
  
"I want you to... to make love to me. Tonight," his hazel-green  
eyes finally lifted, "NOW."  
  
Fraser didn't miss the desperation in Ray's voice, or the barely  
controlled panic in the too luminous eyes. He reached out and caressed  
the thin face, noting the dampness on the warm cheeks. "Why Ray?"  
  
Ray flinched as if struck and pulled back slightly, "Because  
yo... because *I* want to."  
  
Fraser searched the stricken face, recalling something Francesca  
had once said about her brother, 'He's spent so long trying to be what  
he thinks everyone else wants him to be... It's just kind nice to see  
him doing something for *himself* now.' She'd been talking about Ray's  
relationship with him, letting Fraser know that she approved. He hadn't  
really understood what she had meant at the time, but now it was painfully  
clear. Ray was willing to do the one thing he feared most... simply  
because he thought it was what Fraser wanted. He chose his next words  
carefully, "Ray. You don't have to do this."  
  
"Yes I do. I... I *want* to do this Benny... for you. I *have*  
to!"  
  
The fervor behind the words stunned Fraser, "No Ray. You don't."  
Fraser pulled the trembling form to him, softening the words with a touch.  
Ray was ridged against him, the slender body shaking as fear and confusion  
raged through him. "Ray," he whispered into the shell shaped  
ear, "relax. It's alright."  
  
"No. It's not." Fraser could hear the panicked tears  
in his lover's voice and waited to see what would come next, knowing  
his lover needed to get out whatever was causing this pain. "I'm  
sorry Benny. I'm sorry."  
  
Fraser hugged Ray close, kissing Ray's temple lightly, "You've  
said that once tonight already Ray. What are you sorry for Love?"  
Ray's arms wrapped around him tightly and his lips pressed frantic kisses  
to Fraser's neck. Fraser felt his body responding to his lover's touch,  
his manhood swelling, begging for Ray's familiar caress. He forced the  
responses from his mind, willing control, knowing that this was more  
important. *Ray* was more important. "Talk to me Ray," he  
urged, easing Ray back so he could look in those beautiful eyes, "tell  
me what's wrong."  
  
The hazel-green eyes locked on Fraser's blue ones, "I don't  
want you to leave Benny."  
  
The blue eyes clouded in confusion, "I'm not leaving Ray."  
  
"But you *will* be."  
  
As the shaking hands reached for him once again, Fraser thought  
he finally understood. He pulled Ray close, trapping the questing hands  
between their bodies and simply holding his lover. Ray was tense against  
him, the slender body alternately pushing away and leaning into Fraser's  
solid warmth. Fraser was silent as Ray struggled with his inner demons,  
offering his support in the gentle pressure of his embrace. Finally  
Ray stilled against him with a resigned sob, his face buried once again  
against Fraser chest. Only then did Fraser relax his grip, "Ray,"  
he whispered, "I'm not going anywhere. I promise."  
  
"People break promises all the time Benny."  
  
"Have I ever broken a promise to you Ray?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Then why would I start now?"  
  
"I...." Ray shook his head, his lightly stubbled cheek  
rasping against Fraser's bare chest.  
  
"Ray, Love, talk to me. What's going on?" Ray tried  
to pull away but Fraser held him fast, "No Ray. You're not going  
anywhere until you talk to me. Why do you think I'll leave?"  
  
"Because you will." His father's words came to him again,  
"You'll get tired of me refus... of my temper or any number of my  
bad habits. You'll realize that I'm not what you thought and you'll  
leave."  
  
Fraser didn't miss Ray's stumble and suddenly his lover's behavior  
became very clear. He kissed Ray's short dark hair, "I'm not going  
to leave you Ray. Nothing you do... or *don't* do, will change how I  
feel about you... or how long I'm willing to wait until you're ready."  
Fraser felt Ray startle and smiled, "I love you Ray, do you understand?  
If you're never ready, I'll be satisfied with what we have now because  
we're together. *That's* what's important to me Love... *you're* what's  
important to me."  
  
"I... I want to do this for you, Benny."  
  
"And you will... someday. But only when you're *ready*, not  
because you're afraid I'll leave." Fraser lifted Ray's chin, forcing  
the withdrawn detective to meet his eyes. "I love you Ray,"  
he said quietly, kissing the tightly compressed lips, "Always."  
  
Ray's arms tightened around Fraser's waist, "I love you Benny.  
I just..."  
  
"Just what Ray?"  
  
"I want to give you what you want. I know you've wanted to...  
well..." Ray's voice trailed off awkwardly and he felt the heat  
rising in his face. He took a steadying breath and said with touch what  
he couldn't say with words. He ran his hands down Fraser's back, his  
long fingers catching the band of Fraser's boxer shorts and burrowing  
under the soft fabric. He cupped the warmth of Fraser's buttocks, pulling  
the Canadian's hips into contact with his own. He smiled at the deep  
groan the contact elicited from his lover and rubbed his own growing  
erection against Fraser's fabric encased one. Fraser's lips descended  
on his, claiming him with a passionate kiss that left them both breathless.  
  
"Ray..."  
  
"I want to make love with you Benny."  
  
"Understood Ray."  
  
Ray smiled at the familiar response and kissed the Mountie's full  
lips. "You're one in a million Benny, you know that?"  
  
"Thank you kindly Ray. And so are you." Fraser surprised  
his lover, lifting the slight man into his arms and carrying him to the  
bed. He placed his precious burden carefully on the cool sheets then  
lowered himself over his olive skinned lover. His mouth teased and caressed  
the warm flesh, nipping the thin skin over the prominent collar bone,  
the sensitive spots along the long, graceful neck, all the places he  
had spent the last six months learning. He loved the feel of Ray's whipcord  
body under his, the way Ray pressed against him, murmuring his name.  
He trailed kisses down Ray's neck to his chest, pausing at one nut brown  
nipple, taking it in to his mouth and sucking. The body under his arched  
and he increased his attention to the pebbled flesh, bathing it with  
his tongue until Ray whimpered. Long hands twined in Fraser's hair pulling  
him away from his task and up to meet his lover's lips.  
  
Ray kissed Fraser with passionate abandon, losing himself in his  
lover's embrace. His hips pressed upward, contacting with Fraser's hips.  
"Benny."  
  
"Yes Ray?" Fraser sighed between kisses.  
  
"You're still dressed Benny."  
  
Fraser rolled off of his lover's body to stand beside the bed, "So  
take care of it Ray." The blue eyes flashed with loving amusement  
as hazel-green eyes studied him in momentary confusion. "Well?"  
  
With a growl, Ray moved. He pulled the fabric down Fraser's long  
legs with one swift tug then hauled the Canadian back into the bed.   
"I want you Benny," he rasped, "I want *this*."   
He plundered the offered mouth, his tongue exploring the moist heat until  
Fraser moaned. His hands roamed the strong expanse of Fraser's solid  
form, arousing the Canadian with sure, knowing caresses. He pulled their  
bodies together, delighting in his lover's obvious arousal. Fraser pressed  
against him, bringing their erections together in delicious friction.  
Ray's hips twitched upward, increasing the contact and making both men  
moan. He wanted more. He wanted to feel that body pressed against him,  
buried inside him. The thought shook him, the intensity of the need  
surprised him, but he couldn't think of anything he wanted more than  
to be possessed by this gentle man. This gentle man who loved him.   
He stilled Fraser with a touch and tried to collect his thoughts. Fraser  
started to protest, but the look on Ray's face stopped him. He held  
Ray lightly, waiting.  
  
"Benny," he began quietly, "I want you. I want you  
to make love to me."  
  
"Ray, you don't have to do this."  
  
Ray kissed Fraser softly, "You said when I was ready. Well,  
I'm ready." He placed a silencing finger against Fraser's lips  
and smiled shyly, "I know I don't have to... but I want to. I want  
you."  
  
"Are you sure Ray?"  
  
"What part of 'yes' don't you understand Benny?" he countered  
with a grin.  
  
Fraser smiled back. It had been too long since he had seen that  
grin on those beautiful lips. Hazel-green eyes watched him, uncertain  
in the growing silence. Fraser drew Ray close, kissing away any lingering  
doubt before easing Ray down to the mattress. Once again he kissed his  
way down the slender form, caressing, teasing, loving, leaving Ray gasping  
beneath him. He paused at Ray's narrow waist, nipping lightly at the  
golden flesh before levering off his lover's body.  
  
Ray's whimper of protest died as he realized what Fraser was doing.  
He watched nervously as Fraser retrieved the bottle of lubricant from  
the drawer of the bedside table. He shivered as the enormity of what  
they were about to do hit him. His mind flashed images of the brutality  
he had seen associated with this very act, the horror surrounding it  
that he had seen in his work. Then Fraser turned... the love that shone  
in those clear blue eyes drove all doubt from Ray's mind. This was what  
he wanted and Fraser was the one he wanted it with.  
  
Fraser caressed Ray's cheek, "It's alright if you want to back  
out Ray. You know there are other ways to... be together."  
  
Ray flushed, his body responding to the memories of their times "together".  
But he knew what he  
wanted, "Make love to me Benny."  
  
"Gladly Ray." Fraser lowered himself to the bed once  
more, kissing the hip he had so recently abandoned.  
  
"Fraser."  
  
"It's alright Ray. Relax." He ran his tongue over Ray's  
inner thigh, making the detective squirm, "I know what I'm doing."  
Before Ray could protest, Fraser engulfed his lover's engorged manhood  
delighting in the strangled moan the move drew from his Italian. He  
toyed with the heated flesh, his tongue teasing the crown, causing Ray  
to arch against him. He captured the narrow hips, holding Ray still  
as his mouth continued it's exploration. He ran his hand down Ray's  
hip, easing his hand under the writhing body to cup the perfect globes  
of Ray's buttocks. He insinuated a finger between the firm flesh, resting  
its tip against the tight ring of muscle there. He felt Ray still.   
"Relax," he whispered, raising his head from its task long  
enough to reassure his lover. "Trust me Ray."  
  
Trembling fingers twined in his dark hair, "I do Benny. I  
just..."  
  
Fraser kissed Ray's hip, "It's your choice Ray."  
  
"Don't stop."  
  
Fraser's mouth engulfed Ray again and the slender hips lifted, matching  
the rhythm that Fraser's mouth established. Fraser's finger was removed  
only to return slick with gel and press against the star shaped opening  
once more, seeking entrance. Ray gasped and Fraser stilled his hand  
until Ray relaxed. "Ray?"  
  
"Don't stop Benny. Please don't stop."  
  
Fraser smiled and began to thrust gently into his lover's body,  
lubricating and stretching the tight opening, delighting in the soft  
sounds of pleasure falling from his lover's lips. Fraser stroked and  
caressed the responsive body, urging Ray closer to release. Another  
finger joined the first, delving deep into the other man's body, finding  
the bundle of nerves it sought.  
  
Ray's hips jolted upward, his long fingers tightening in Fraser's  
thick hair, "God.... BENNY!" Fraser could feel Ray's body  
tighten around his fingers and knew Ray was close to orgasm. He increased  
his attention to Ray's throbbing organ only to have his movements stilled  
by Ray's slender hands, "No Benny. I want...," Ray's voice  
was breathy, shaken and he struggled to calm it before continuing. "I  
want you inside me. I want to feel you."  
  
"Yes Ray." Fraser eased his fingers from Ray's body and  
urged his lover onto his stomach. Ray moved willingly, raising himself  
to his knees and offering himself to the man he loved. Fraser leaned  
forward and gently kissed his Italian detective. Ray's tongue slid over  
Fraser's lips, delving inside, claiming the Canadian's mouth with his  
own. Fraser could feel his own body responding to Ray's need, his manhood  
aching to feel Ray's body closing around him... he moaned. "Ray."  
  
Ray kissed him again, his hand reaching up to caress the turgid  
flesh between the powerful legs. Fraser's hips pressed forward, pushing  
him against Ray's palm, "I want you Fraser. Now!"  
  
Fraser leaned back, took the bottle of lubricant and coated his  
erection liberally with the cool gel. Ray watched silently, his eyes  
never leaving his lover's beautiful face. He startled as Fraser's hands  
caressed his back and buttocks, he searched the handsome face and was  
both surprised and reassured by the love and concern he saw in those  
bright blue eyes. He relaxed into the touch, welcoming the familiar  
warmth of Fraser's caress.  
  
Fraser moved to kneel behind him, stroking the length of Ray's long  
back reassuringly. He eased Ray's long legs apart and settled himself  
between them, his hips brushing Ray's perfect backside. He parted the  
olive flesh with trembling hands, running his finger down the delicate  
crease and causing his lover to tremble. He pressed gently against Ray's  
opening with his finger, easing more lubricant into the tight flesh.  
Ray whimpered and pressed backward into the touch. Fraser smiled and  
removed his finger, replacing it with something larger. He positioned  
himself against Ray, stilling the Italian's hips with his hands as he  
struggled for control. "Relax for me Ray," he urged. "Relax."  
The body under his hands stilled and Ray drew a deep breath. "Good,"  
he whispered and began to press forward.  
  
Ray whimpered as Fraser eased into his body. He fought to stay  
still, to relax as his lover urged him to. It was unlike anything he  
had ever experienced. There was some pain, but it was more of an uncomfortable  
fullness and Ray knew it wouldn't last. Slowly, Fraser pressed inward,  
claiming Ray inch by precious inch. The pain gave way to a feeling of  
delicious possession and Ray sighed out Fraser's name. Fraser's body  
bent over his, covering him protectively. Strong arms encircled him  
and Fraser's passion roughened voice sounded softly in his ears, "I  
love you Ray. I love you."  
  
Ray pressed his hips back, welcoming Fraser even deeper into him,  
"I love you too, Benny. Always."  
  
Fraser moaned and his tenuous control finally slipped. He began  
to thrust into his lover's tight sheath, but even in his passion he was  
gentle, giving Ray time to adjust to the newness of their joining, not  
wanting to hurt Ray. Ray's breathing grew ragged, his movements jerky  
and Fraser knew it wouldn't be long. He reached around the slender waist  
and grasped Ray's erection, stroking it in a counterpoint to his own  
thrusts. Ray's head lolled forward, his body responding to Fraser's  
touch with abandon. He cried out Fraser's name as his body tightened,  
the first tendrils of release sparking across his nerve endings. Fraser  
increased the pressure and speed of his strokes, milking Ray's straining  
erection, drawing the welcome release from his lover's shaking form.  
Ray's head snapped back, Fraser's name a broken prayer on his parted  
lips as he spilled his seed in hot spurts into Fraser's hand. His body  
tightened around Fraser like a silken vice and the Canadian quickly joined  
him in release.  
  
Slowly Fraser's breathing calmed and he became aware of his surroundings  
once more. He lay against Ray's back, his arms still wrapped tightly  
around the slender form. He started to move off the quiet form but Ray's  
hands caught his arms, holding him still, "Not yet Benny... please."  
  
"Of course Ray," he whispered. He nestled closer, feeling  
Ray's heartbeat against his hands as it slowly returned to normal. He  
eased them onto their sides, still joined, and settled Ray back against  
his chest. He nuzzled the delicate juncture of shoulder and neck, "Thank  
you kindly Ray."  
  
Ray laughed sleepily, "I should be telling you that love.   
I can't believe I waited so long."  
  
Fraser chuckled, "It was worth the wait Ray." He kissed  
his lover's cheek and was rewarded with a half stifled yawn. He eased  
his softening member from it's resting place and silenced Ray's protests  
with a gentle kiss. He rose from the bed and headed for the kitchen.  
He dampened a towel with warm water from the sink and quickly cleaned  
himself, surprised by the aftershocks that surged through him. He looked  
back towards the bedroom and smiled at the picture his lover made, sprawled  
unselfconsciously across the bed. He rewarmed the towel in the water  
from the faucet, shut off the water and returned to the bedroom. With  
soft touches he cleaned his lover's body, smiling at the trust Ray's  
relaxed posture portrayed. Finishing, he lay the towel aside and joined  
Ray on the bed. He drew the covers up over them and settled Ray back  
against him. Ray's long legs entwined with his, pulling their bodies  
together and Fraser sighed, contentedly. He wrapped his arms around  
Ray's slumbering form and soon joined his lover in peaceful rest.  
  
********  
A sharp clap of thunder woke Fraser with a start. He realized he  
was once again alone in the large bed and started to rise to find Ray.  
  
"He's all right Son. Give him a few minutes though."  
  
"Dad?" Fraser turned to find his father's ghost standing  
beside the bed clad in his dress uniform. "Dad," he whispered,  
flustered by his father's unexpected appearance, "what are you doing  
here?"  
  
"Keeping an eye on you two. Your mother thought you might  
need some reassurance." Fraser senior turned to face his son and  
flushed, "She seems to think you two might be having some... problems."  
His grey eyes darted toward the window and Fraser junior followed the  
gaze. Ray stood at the window, his hands moving as if he was speaking  
with someone. Fraser started to go to him but his father stopped him,  
"He's a good man Son. It might not be the relationship I envisioned  
for you, but I can see you love him very much."  
  
"Yes sir. I do."  
  
Fraser senior cleared his throat awkwardly, "Well... that's  
the important thing. He loves you?"  
  
"Yes sir, he does."  
  
"Good. Treat each other well Boy." He turned away from  
the bed, "He's going to need a lot of love Son, he reminds me of  
your mother in that respect. Do a better job than I did in making sure  
he knows how you feel."  
  
"Yes sir. Thank you kindly for the advice."  
  
"Thank your mother Son. She opened my eyes to a great many  
things... I just wish I learned them sooner." He turned back towards  
the bed once more, "I'm proud of you son, very proud."  
  
Fraser studied his father for a moment then smiled, "Thank  
you sir... Dad." Fraser senior returned the smile, then with a  
tip of his hat he disappeared. Fraser stared for several moments at  
the spot where his father had been, feeling more light-hearted than he  
had in years. Ray's voice drifted through the apartment and Fraser strained  
to hear his lover's voice...  
  
  
Ray regarded his father with a look somewhere between disgust and  
sorrow, "No Pop. I'm *not* sorry. I love him and that's all there  
is to it."  
  
Carmine Vecchio snorted and turned his back on his son, "You're  
a fool Boy, you always were."  
  
Ray bowed his head, "Maybe so Pop. But I'm my *own* fool.  
I make my own choices and I'm not going to let you run my life anymore.  
He's the best thing that ever happened to me and I'm happier than I've  
been in years. Nothing you say will change how I feel Pop, nothing."  
  
"Then it's on your head," the elder Vecchio spat, "I  
hope you're happy."  
  
"Yeah Pop, I am. I'm sorry you don't approve, but I'm not  
going to let that stop me. I love Benny too much for that. Go away  
Pop. Go away and let me live my life in peace." Ray turned away  
from his father, letting the spray of the rain coming through the window  
cool his flushed face, "Good bye Pop." He bowed his head,  
the familiar feelings of loss and failure assaulting him once more.  
  
Warm hands pulled him back from the window and wrapped a soft towel  
around his damp shoulders. He pulled the towel tighter around him as  
Fraser closed the window, blocking out the rain. He stood silently as  
Fraser turned and began to dry him, the strong hands surprisingly gentle  
as they wiped the rain and tears from Ray's face.  
  
"Are you alright Ray?"  
  
Ray regarded the handsome face, feeling his heart lighten at the  
peace he found in Fraser's pale gaze. The words of the song filtered  
back through his thoughts,  
  
*While the world outside my window goes insane.  
*You're here to remind me...  
*A few good things remain.  
  
"Yeah Benny. I'm fine... now," he pulled the Canadian  
into his arms, needing to feel the reassuring press of Fraser's body  
against his own.  
  
Fraser wrapped his arms around Ray's slender form, "I'm glad  
Ray." The sound of the rain against the window was oddly soothing  
in the stillness of the apartment. Fraser stroked Ray's short, damp  
hair, holding him close. He could feel the tension in Ray's body as  
it molded to his and recalled his father's words, "Ray."  
  
"Yeah Benny?" came the muffled reply.  
  
"I love you."  
  
  
"I love you too Benny."  
  
There was a long pause and Fraser felt the tension slowly easing  
from Ray's body. He stood, holding his lover tenderly. The words when  
they came were spoken so softly that Fraser almost missed them.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
Fraser studied his lover in confusion, "For what Ray?"  
  
"For loving me." Hazel-green eyes searched Fraser's face  
self-consciously, "For... everything."  
  
Fraser led Ray away from the window and back to the warmth of their  
bed. The towel and two robes fell to the floor in rapid succession and  
two forms lowered to the mattress. Fraser covered Ray's body with his  
own, his hands skimming the lithe form and drawing quiet moans of pleasure  
from the detective. "Understood Ray," he said, capturing one  
sensitive nipple between his teeth and nipping lightly, "Understood."  
  
*like a warm spring rain  
*on the roof above  
*the way you call my name  
*when we make love  
*while the world outside my window goes insane  
*you're here to remind me a few good things remain  
                                A  
Few Good Things Remain  
                                  
by Kathy Mattea  
  
The End  
  
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